More memories

Jerry remembered of a time prior the catholic church experience. He said he was around 12 or 13. I made Jerry get a notebook and requested that he use for notes in between interviews. I was glad he did as tons of past experiences are being recorded daily now. The only problem is there not coming in chronological order. That's okay. I bring it to the blog as I get it--raw and out of order. 
So Jerry and three other foster boys went to live with a foster parent that lived in Crestline California. This was in the mountains near Lake Arrowhead. The foster parent was a man probably in his mid 40s. The events are foggy. But Jerry remembers this man was constantly requesting the boys sleep with him in his bed. Jerry remembers crying and pleading with the man to not make him sleep in the same bed.  He just wanted to be in his own room. Jerry didn't stay there long. When asked how he was able to avoid the foster parent's advances, Jerry said that there was one foster brother that did not resist and slept in with the foster parent. He knew that the foster parent was inappropriate with the boy and maybe that kept the man at bay. Who knows. Jerry didn't stick around to assess it.
     At a certain point, Jerry had a cycle/pattern of going in and out custody. He would run and stay out as long as he could stand it. He told me of one time when he was having a particularly hard time with the elements. It was cold primarily. He speculated that he was around 14 (give or take a year). He found himself in front of a doughnut shop. He saw a brick near by. Most of the time all he would have to do is walk down some streets at 3 am. A cop would see him, run his name and then take him in because he had a warrant. This time it wasn't happening as fast as he needed it to happen. Jerry picked up that brick and threw it through the doughnut store window. "I didn't even get a doughnut", he said. "I just sat and waited while an alarm made me deaf." Jerry was back in Juvenile Hall with in an hour. Jerry's ability to take care of himself was amazing. I told him that his ability to adapt was considerably more that just being considered a resilient kid. When asked what he thought of his own survival tactics, Jerry was very modest. He didn't want to boast of his cunning use of what was available--even it was illegal. He did offer some insight though. Jerry was quick to learn and live by the code "Never trust anyone". Jerry learned very early that he had to take care of himself first and only. If others were brought in on any crime or scam/hussle, it always meant problems. All through out Jerry's time in custody he said he would hear story after story of how partner's on the street would eventually turn on each other. This included those in the gangs. Jerry instinctively knew that going it alone was safer and would increase his odds of surviving. Growing up in the system, Jerry would learn of many many brothers and sisters in the system that were found dead. Drugs, gangs what ever. Jerry often wondered who would be next. It was truly a game of survival.  Looking back, Jerry says he made himself invisible. Inside everyone knew Jerry. He wasn't a rat but he kept to himself. We'll get more into this aspect in his adult incarceration years.